The F Word

I’m here to talk about that most dirty of “f words”. That’s right, you’ve guessed it. Feminism. Oh, you didn’t guess it? Well that’s great news! Because it isn’t a dirty word. Misused, misjudged and misunderstood, yes. But dirty? Most certainly not.

I am incredibly fortunate to have a wonderful and inspirational best friend, who for some time has, rather unknowingly, taught me a lot about feminism. Through her I have slowly come to realise that feminism isn’t all bra burning, hairy under armed, in-your-face women. Quite the contrary. I myself am a feminist and I would never harm a bra and am rather fond of a smooth armpit. We’ll skip the part where I deny being in-your-face. Because I’m not certain that I can entirely deny that one. I have my moments. But I say it again, unashamedly: I am a feminist. And if you’re reading this and are a part of my life, then I truly hope you are too. Male or female. There’s a feminist in us all, even if we may not realise it.

If you already think men and women should be paid equally, be afforded the same rights and opportunities, be free to make their own decisions and live the life that suits them without being subject to harsh judgement, then you’re pretty well there. And that’s the bare bones of feminism right there. Equality. That’s all it is, at its core. A desire for equality.

I’m still pretty new to all this myself. A fledgling feminist just coming to terms with my new wings. But I am learning and evolving all the time. The fabulous aforementioned friend gave me a book for my 25^th birthday by the incredibly talented Caitlin Moran. This has been an enormous catalyst in my writing this little piece. She talks about all the myths of feminism and dispels the more ridiculous notions. How to be a Woman truly is worth a read, and I urge you all to pick up a copy. It had me laughing and crying and more importantly, really thinking. There are lots of experiences she’s been through that most of us can relate to, and I found it to be a great introduction to feminism if you just aren’t quite sure what the heck it’s all about. Any woman who asks me to stand on a chair and shout “I am a feminist” and reclaim the word “cunt” is all together brilliant in my mind.

Feminism is slowly gaining momentum, and has been gradually building for some time. But there is still such a long way to go. I used to worry that my own goals in life were contradictory to feminism. However I am now aware that they aren’t. Far from it. My desire to live the life I want to live and have the freedom to enjoy myself and express my opinions is in fact well within the walls of feminism. I am not desperate for a career or anything like that and I genuinely do hope to one day be a mother, spending my days looking after my house and my children, cooking dinner for my family and spending time with the people I love. I am fortunate enough to live in a time where people are slowly starting to understand that I am not being old fashioned, or bowing down to the patriarchy. I genuinely don’t enjoy working, I believe I was born to be a mother. If I am lucky enough I will get to fulfil that dream and not feel judged for it.

So I guess that’s it on this one for now. I don’t want to ramble on. I would like you to have a little think though, about what feminism means to you. Don’t be scared, it could open up a whole world of inspiration to you.